Growing Older & Staying in Love

This may be the most important decision you can make in your later years

When you decide to keep intimacy alive.

Two of the most common casualties of growing older are romance and intimacy. Ill health, menopause and hormonal changes can all contribute to the private life of a marriage changing. Where did all that spontaneous affection go? Because ageing, falling libido and over-familiarity can all have an impact over the years, and couples sometimes simply miss the fact that physical affection has left the building.

Growing older is something we cannot change. And ageing often comes with unwelcome side effects. The good news is that we can do something about some of the effects of ageing.

Growing old is partly a mental issue: “You’re only as old as you think you are” is a time-worn saying and it has a lot of truth about it. But if we see our advancing years as a challenge and decide to work at health, fitness, and mental attitude, these years can be some of the best times of our life. At least that’s what I’m counting on.

There are some fundamental truths, though, that cannot be challenged:

● That we will definitely get older

● That keeping fit and healthy requires more work the older we get. Because poor health and lack of fitness are also responsible for some of the most significant negative impacts on our love lives in later years, the work is well worthwhile.

Here’s an important fact for you: we are meant to be connected to somebody. We are born this way and we stay the same until we die. We need to be loved and we need to feel safe. So we know that intimacy is very important in relationships: It’s where physical and mental wellbeing are usually grounded.

So it seems to me that keeping the intimacy and romance alive in our relationships should be one of our highest priorities. However, the chances of achieving any of this without good health and fitness are remote.

Here are the points: Not only is intimacy nice, but it’s also critical to our wellbeing. It’s worth the time and effort to restore it, maintain it and refresh it. But also remember that great relationships are much like great cooking; it often takes a lot of thinking about and sometimes careful planning.

You’ll note that I keep using the words “decide” and “decision”. That’s because changing your life usually requires a conscious decision. You need to decide to do something about your health and fitness and you need to decide to work on your relationship. I enjoy this subject and will publish more on intimacy very soon. If you are interested in further information on keeping love alive, please watch for further blogs. Or drop me a line.

-Jim